The trick is that B&M doesn’t offer the appropriate brackets or adapters for an FMX. More lost love for the cast iron slushbox! I’ve read a lot on the Internet that this install simply isn’t possible, but I of course wasn’t deterred. Nor should you be.

So, how does one do this? Follow along, and I shall show you:

First off, the easy part. You’ll need to weld up a bracket to hold the cable in place. Using the spacers from the B&M kit, along with looking at the brackets they do provide, this should be pretty easy. The cable obviously has to end up facing toward the shift lever on the transmission. Here it is sitting on my workbench; this is roughly the view you’d have looking up at it installed on the pan.

Now, the transmission shift lever must point DOWN, so that the cable movement will actuate the manual engagement in the box correctly. Mine, naturally, pointed upwards. So, I had to fabricate a lever extension:

The measurements I’ve doodled there show the length of throw on the B&M shifter cable (1.75”) and the diameter of (if memory serves) the shaft going into the transmission. The round bottomed hole in the middle there allows the fabricated lever to slip over the kickdown lever, and sit on top of the factory shift lever. The hole in the upper right is for a bolt and nylock nut to fasten the new bracket to the old.

Here’s a picture of the bracket installed on my transmission. It’s cropped from another picture, but it should give you the idea. I made all of these parts so that I could install them WITHOUT removing the trans from the car. If your transmission is out of the car, your job is far easier. You can probably just weld an extension on the factory bracket, and be done more swiftly  without having to shape the part to fit over the kickdown lever and bolt into place. This picture is from when I took the transmission out of the car, once I determined that shifter or not, it was a dead duck in need of rebuild. Oh, well.

On the bottom, you see two holes. One was a mis-drill, the other is the point where the B&M cable end attaches to the lever. This attachment point is the most critical part of the project here.  It has to be in precisely the correct spot, the right radius out from the center of the factory selector shaft. To do this, you need to mark the attachment hole. I tried a bunch of ways to make this work, then, as with most things that require very precise measurements, I made a jig, so I wouldn’t have to measure at all!

I made some pictograms to articulate this a few years ago, follow along below:

Its’ really this easy, folks. Really. Of course, after a year or so, I swapped in a 4R70W for my ride, because I can’t leave well enough alone. And, for your enjoyment, here’s that ride:

(Edited and updated 10/24/2010)

I’ll jump to the punch line.

It sucks.

Now that I’ve ruined your day, I guess some folks don’t even know what this thing is supposed to be. Honestly, I’m not sure either.

According to Logitech and Google, it’s the future of the television “experience,” melding television with the Internet. The device connects between your existing television source device (cable box, TIVO, satellite receiver, U-verse miracle device, etc.) and takes your couch time to a whole new level.

Using only the controller for the Revue (a nearly full-sized keyboard comes standard) you can operate your new television viewing life. Search for programs (rather than using your old and boring onscreen guide, or perhaps your “TV Guide” (do those still come in the Sunday paper?), set them to record (if you have DVR functionality somewhere in your stack), and then watch your programming.

You can also, of course, watch much Internet content. Supposedly… Much of it isn’t (yet?) compatible with the device, and what does show up is pretty ugly to look at. What looks pretty good in a 4 or 6” wide window on your computer monitor doesn’t look so nice on your 40+” HDTV. The resolution and data streams simply aren’t there. I’m sure there are some streams that work, but they seem to be primarily the streaming movie services, and even those aren’t very slick on the Revue.

Before going farther, I’ll point out that I’m a Logitech fan. This here is a logitech keyboard. We have several Logitech Squeeze Players in the house. Their Harmony remotes are what we use, too. So when I saw this was coming I actually factored the Logitech connection more strongly than the Google connection. I figured their integration skills would make this a strong performer.

So, like I was saying, this thing sucks.

Pretty much totally. Sure, it’s brand new on the market, but it’s locked up a few times on me in the first hour. The first time during the setup (just shut down completely, and I had to unplug it,) then subsequently with a couple of these:

And, most importantly, it …. I think it really doesn’t DO anything.

I take that back. It is another way to watch pixelated YouTube videos on my HDTV. That’s totally killer.  If I do that, what the hell am I supposed to do at work all day?! Here’s the one use for that. Find something hilarious on YouTube, like this:

and you can share it with folks on the big screen for chuckles. It still looks bad, but at least you can all watch it without hunching over a desk.

Oh, and Netflix streaming. Big whoop. I can also do that via my TIVO, Blu-ray Player, the TV itself, and probably directly from my shoes, if I could get them on the LAN.

Specific to Netflix, the interface on the Revue is ok, and having the keyboard makes it easy to get set up, but after all that, you still get directed to "go to your computer to add to your instant queue." Well that’s great. Which I guess means switch over to the browser, and navigate to Netflix.com, and log in, and search for their lame-ass thin content, and add it to the instant queue, and switch back and…

Oh, that’s right, you savvy technology buyer, you picked up on that… You early GOOGLE TV adopter… now that you have the revue, you can SURF THE WEB! On yer damned TeeVee BOX!!! Incredible. Imagine, surfing the web, except giant. Everything is… BIG! CNN is extra large! I just don’t get surfing the web on TV, I guess. Stupid me.

Supposedly, when you’re watching TV (which comes from your existing cable box, remember) you can bring up a browser window in the screen (your TEEVEE! You’re browsing on the TEEVEE!) and surf the web. I guess you can search for a less lame digital video device whilst watching CHiPs.

And yes, Alan, it shares the screen, so you can do both at once. So you can search for suitable new safari hats whilst watching a show about the veld.

Amazon video on demand is supported. And it’s also already covered by every other device I own, including the collar we have on our dog.

Ok, interesting, there’s an "app" on there to watch HBO. OK, that might be good. HBO on demand, since I never think to actually watch HBO shows. You have to authenticate, to show you subscribe to HBO already, which makes some sense.

Of course, to do this, it then kicks you over to the Comcast site in my case, where it tells you to watch the video there. Which doesn’t work.

A nice "Windows XP or Vista, or Mac OS 10.3 or greater" message. Hilarious. Of course, we can absolutely blame Comcast for this, but come on Google; nice launch app, ya nitwits.

It also does BLIP. And Vevo, which I assume are both totally pornographic, or something. Didn’t look. There’s a CNBC thing. Which I guess is interesting, if you give a crap about that, and want to watch it on your TV. I did note that it has a window of video, and some scrolling tickers and all kinds of fixed-screen stuff that I’d be paranoid about causing burn on my display if I had a plasma set.

And Twitter! You betcha it tweets. Tweets like a sonofagun, I guess? 140 characters in HD. That’s clever. Oh, and Pandora, so you can watch music on TV. I loves to watch me some music on my TV. Same with Napster. That’s super cool. Blech. Why would people watch (err… listen) to Pandora on the TV? Either you’re listening via the TV speakers (shudder) or you’re… Ok, so if you don’t have any other way to listen to streaming music via your home theater setup, I guess this can work. But please, remember to set your processor back to 2 channel for this. And then switch back when you go watch actual video content.

Still, looking at the interface, here’s a snappy little icon! Something called Logitech Vid HD, for HD video conferencing to another one of these things, assuming you have the appropriate devices, and required camera. Whoopty doo.

What else.. what else… I guess if you choose during setup to loop your cable box through the device, it controls that for you.

With a keyboard!

Yeah, rather than via your totally inconvenient existing remote control, you can change the channels and stuff with this baby.

And it may do some DVR type crap, I guess, but it sure is hard to believe anyone buying this thing doesn’t already have a DVR.

Have I mentioned the keyboard has a sweet SEARCH key on it?

Well it does:

Behold the majesty, press that sucker, type some crap and find… The Internet. Which is full of words and pictures and 45 second clips of crap I could watch on my computer or iPhone or iPad, or better yet, not at all.

Speaking of SEARCHING, my big experiment here was a search for Andy Griffith. There’s something that I can watch! Clicked a thing then clicked a thing and got to watch a long ass commercial for ANDROID on whatever site was hosting the show (Nick at nite?)

Oh, I accidentally clicked on that commercial. It popped out of the browser interface, took over my entire screen and LOUDLY proclaimed awesomeness for Android. Well, that was super annoying.

Finally got to watch the show. Saw the first half, and the screen went black. Commercial? Dunno, it was the right time for it, but the video never came back. Oh, and yes, it looked like crap when it was playing. It was the episode where the stranger comes to town and knows everybody. One of my favorites, if for no other reason that it’s the one with the “other” Floyd.

Limited support for DLNA. It found my media server downstairs, but would only play a little of the content. Boo-hiss. Claims future intent to add more content types, but there’s nothing particularly new about my content, frankly.

To be fair, it is a pretty nice way to view your online Picasa picture albums.

So, there’s that. Pictures. On your TV.

The included keyboard is nice, and the RF works well. But it’s really too big… It’s a keyboard, after all.

All manner of indications of an iPhone app to control it, but that doesn’t actually seem to exist yet. Logitech site talks all about it in the present tense, but it’s nowhere to be found.

Supposedly it’s "compatible" with an existing Logitech Harmony remote. So, I figured I’d try that out with our Harmony 900 RF remote.

Or not.

Sure, sure, the Logitech Harmony programming interface is currently "Down for routine maintenance.’ Of course it is! I do all my routine maintenance on Friday afternoons. It’s the coolest time to do it.

Update, Sunday, October 24 2010. Logitech Harmony interface is still down.

So, the net is that I unplugged it all, and I’ll send it back. Unless someone else wants to try it, and convince me it doesn’t suck.

Love and Kisses, Evil Jim

For the remainder of the winter, I shall be crafting and enjoying cocktails that your grandparents might remember. Or, your parents, depending on your age.

Because I’m already a prolific drinker, to make it more challenging for myself I shall not include such standards as Martini’s, Manhattans, Old Fashioneds, Collinses… I’m going for the OTHER ones.

Singapore Sling. Sidecar. Rob Roy. Things like that.

Suggestions?

Mallow-Cakes are a tasty way to enjoy any Friday evening. The odd thing about them was that the mallow failed to sink very deep into the batter, thus only creating a surface effect. And, they added little to no flavor to the cake. Esthetically, however, it’s a hit. Looks like confetti.

Taste tests show it’s still tasty though.

Enjoy.

Stay tuned, as we venture into the dark underworld of marshmallow experimentation…

It’s the “kill” part that took my fancy for my first experiment. All in all, it went pretty well, Experiment 1.

Observe, and be titillated.

Oh yes.

So, we travelled recently up to the NC Mountains for some peace, quiet, and fellowship. Peace, disturbed. Quiet, decimated. Fellowship, attained.

The question that needed to be answered was “Just what happens when you attempt to use dehydrated cereal marsmallows as a firearm projectile?”

Answer: They work better than expected.

Step one: Load powder (about 3 grains, a tiny amount) and then load marshmallows.

About 6-8 marshmallows, max.

Then, fire. Bang. At a range of 6 feet or so, this is the result.

The cardboard has been punctured, and the 'mallows are nowhere to be found. Must be behind there, somewhere.

This was such a rousing success that I heard “Hey! What are you doin’ over there? Bring that over HERE!”

This was the call from a neighbor who we will call Tim. Tim is an interesting and funny fellow, with some experience with firearms, projectiles, photography, and travels to foreign lands. I picked up my supplies, and wandered over to his deck. He was at first dismayed and a bit confused by my insistence on firing marshmallows from a perfectly serviceable firearm. But once he knew he’d get to do the shooting henceforth, whilst I was taking pictures, he was much more enthused.

So, several more test firings, about 10 foot range, 10 grains of powder. Much more impressive BOOM, but pretty much decimated my projectile before it could do much damage. Cardboard is still penetrated, but only in small holes, not the single, more impressive looking puncture. Analysis: This would perhaps hurt if you got shot, and that’s about it.

Before. Note intact, boring cardboard.

AND THEN!

Note the impressive penetrating power of high velocity marshmallows.

Following the rousing success of this experiment (well, actually, following the cleaning of the pistol,) I moved on to the next question…

Just what happens when these things encounter colored cereal marshmallows?

Well, they eat them.

Of course they eat them.

And, so did I.

Not too bad, really. Not terribly clever, but not too bad.

I have procured these little marvels for the sole purpose of redistribution. They are being doled out, in 7 oz increments, in many directions, on the condition that the consumption (or other utilization) be documented here, at TheRooseveltExperiment.com.

I have a few ideas of my own, but I’m hoping that others have superior ideas, and at least take a picture or two of their achievements, and perhaps provide some snappy dialog.

So, if you’re the lucky recipient of some of these small, colored, dehydrated marshmallows, please take the time to register here (link below) and you will get your login details! You’ll be Internet Famous! It’s gonna be swell, I promise. Also, bloggity blog blog. I hate blogs. But I also hate iPhones, and I got one of those, too.

So, if you want in on the DCDM action, let me know, and I’ll hook you up.

First bag is free.

The marshmallows arrived yesterday.

A box of marshmallows

The box was about the size I expected. These suckers are more dense than you might imagine, for a dehydrated food product.

So, this morning, I portioned them out into smaller bags; each about 7 or so ounces. The larger bag has marshmallows, and primarily, ground/dusted marshmallows. I have no idea what to do with that.

Bags o mallows.

His grandson once said, “Many people — and this is on record — say, ‘The President made the worst martinis I’ve ever tasted.’”   
     
     Just how bad must a martini be to be classified as “horrible”?
     Can  a martini be so bad as to be undrinkable?

What happens when you take any particular food, drink, ingredient, and put it in the hands of a potentially unskilled user? Let’s find out, starting with….

Little, dehydrated, colored marshmallows.